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Kids, your mother's a slut.

Dearest GlamPa, 
I have fallen head over heels for someone I met online. Is that the done thing nowadays? Is it wrong to be happily planning a future for once my Spawns are grown and on their own? I mean, obviously we are meeting up in real time as much as we can, but most of our relationship is conducted on messenger and Skype.  Have I lost my damned mind? 

Signed
Internet Iris

Well,
Iris, you're writing a man who dances around in a sarong and sings showtunes all day, for advice, so I'd venture to say, "YES, you've lost your mind." 
B.) It sounds like you are talking about two separate things. 
Is this a potential "catfish" scenario? By your note it seems as though you have actually met in person, so I am assuming you have. So, shall we move forward with that as our basis? 
I know many, many people who've met online only to have a wonderful fulfilling relationship follow. I met my darling spouse on the interwebs, and we've been virtually (not "virtual reality" virtual, but "old people dictionary" virtual) inseparable ever since. 
It sounds like you are keeping in touch via recent technological advances in communications. Fabulous. So, what the fuck are you worried about? This is not your parents world. People don't meet at the sock hop and go parking at the overlook after sipping an egg cream. The sockhop is Tinder and the eggcream is, well,... If you don't know what the eggcream is, you'll have to ask a follow up. Embrace the Dodo, or the Dodo dies. #DodoMurderer
Let's look at this from a different perspective. Do you have friends you've met online, don't see very often, but keep in touch with via social media, etc? Do you feel those are genuine relationships? If so, then why should this be any different? The only thing the comes to mind that could be a glaring negative, is if you don't communicate or have the same connection in person as you do online. But that, too, is surmountable.
Lastly, regarding the rightness or wrongness of planning a future for after your kids are grown and hopefully moved out of the house. (although, if you're Italian, you've got a while) Fuck the kids. They're just an energy suck. (That was my answer, but if I follow my dear Mother's lead my response would be, "They are your primary concern while in your care. Some things must take a back seat." I have the best Mom, btw.) But, back to the brats, your happiness is necessary in order to take proper care of them. If you can't get your own oxygen mask on, there's no way you'll get one on your kids. If you feel you need to wait until they're older to introduce them to this new individual, you know best. But, if this person doesn't want to be a part of your kids life and that is why you are holding off, dump them. They're not the right person for you. Trust me. 

Really, trust me on that last point.

xoxo G





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